SWAN LAKE RELOADED London Coliseum

Fredrik Rydman’s ballet is billed as Tchaikovsky Meets Street Dance. Purists should stay miles away. The pre-recorded score used here is only partially by Tchaikovsky and has been grossly distorted, scratched and slowed down. Music is also provided by Swedish and international pop and rock writers. There are no swans, no tutus and no classical duets in this version. So it’s hardly Swan Lake, is it? The swans have been transformed into prostitutes in black boots, white furs and synthetic wigs. The evil Von Rothbart (danced by Daniel Koivunen who gets the production off to a good start) is a long-legged pimp, a sinister drug dealer, who prowls the stage, head down, and pays the girls with heroin and fish. The show is vulgar and kinky, ugly and creepy-crawly, surreal and very loud. Siegfried’s jokey, bad-taste birthday presents are not for family audiences. The production is at its most enjoyable when it concentrates on the breakdancing. The climax, played out in a snowstorm of white feathers, is dramatic; but the actual relationship between Siegfried and Odette is totally uninvolving.